Tolerance

Biblical Example – The Apostle Paul

Coming from a Pharisaical background, Paul, the apostle, had been educated to believe that he and his fellow Pharisees were the only ones that were holding to the true Jewish faith. But God wrought a remarkable change in him. As he later wrote to the Corinthians, who he is, is not important, but what he is to others is extremely important.

“…I have become all things to all men, that I might by all means save some.”
(1 Corinthians 9:22)

Paul was ready to spread the Gospel wherever he could, and was not overly concerned that those who were lost live up to his standards. But he also realized that he could not expect from others, a standard that he did not live up to himself.

“But I pommel my body and subdue, lest after preaching to others, I myself should be disqualified..” (1 Corinthians 9:27)

And what was that standard? It was Christlikeness:

“Brethren, I do not consider that I have made it my own [yet]; but one thing I do, forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.” 
(Philippians 3:13-14)

Paul realized his own inadequacies and knew that others had inadequacies also. How could he expect a higher standard of others than he expected of himself? He learned to accept the differences that he saw in others, not because they were better or worse, but because they were of little importance in light of what God wanted to accomplish.

Did Paul hold the differing qualities of life, of those that he ministered to, as more important than their salvation? No. He saw himself on a journey to becoming like Christ, and it mattered to him where others were on their journey. How could he help them to become more Christlike? Surely not by pointing out their differences!

As he matured in Christ Paul saw himself as less and less important, and the release of the love of God toward others as more and more important.

Tolerance In Our Lives –

Do you have standards that you tout because they are a way to cause you to “shine” above others? But standards which, in the purposes of God, are really of little or no importance? Are you willing to accept the differences of others, in order to be a tool in the hand of God to bring salvation and Christlikeness to them? Are you willing to die to everything in your life, so that the nature of Jesus shines through?

Here are five “I will” principles whose practice will help us incorporate the character quality of tolerance into our lives (write these on a poster, board, or overhead transparency).

1. I will not confuse what is right with what is popular.
2. I will expect the same of myself as I expect of others.
3. I will look for ways to help others mature.
4. I will accept my own unchangeables and the unchangeables of others.
5. I will listen before I form an opinion.

Closing #1: Let’s dialog about it with one another.

Tolerance In My Life This Week –

• Shift the group into small discussion groups of 3-4.
• Encourage groups to list the hindrances in their own lives to practicing tolerance in their families and with acquaintances.
• Ask groups to share their feelings with the whole group.

Closing #2: Let’s close in silent prayer, ask God:

• To forgive you for things in your life that cause you to focus on yourself instead of the needs that are around you.
• To show you how to practice tolerance in your life.
• To make you aware of opportunities to grow in this character quality.

​Biblical Example – Moses
Exodus 12:38,14:10-12,15:23-24,16:2-3,17:1-2,32:19-20

Few biblical leaders had to exercise tolerance to the extent that Moses did. He was assigned the task of bringing the Israelites out of Egypt. In the process of doing that, God’s power was exhibited through ten plagues that struck Egypt and its people. Whether people were impressed by this display of power, or just not willing to remain in Egypt, we are told that a “mixed multitude” went up out of Egypt, along with the six hundred thousand Israelite men. We are not given a clue as to the nationalities of these people, but it is certain they were not followers of the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob. Moses had to tolerate the people of God, as well as the people unfamiliar with the God of Israel. We must remember that even the Israelites were not all that familiar with the God of Israel, and Moses knew this. They had lived in the land of Egypt for 430 years. We are not told that they had any prophets or priests among them to instruct them in the ways of God. They were probably well assimilated into Egyptian culture and religion. They may have heard of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, their ancestors, but who was this new God who displayed such power and expected their obedience? Moses understood that the people were going to have to learn many new ways, and this helped him be a little more tolerant.

When we are told of the people complaining, the sons of Israel are named specifically, but the foreigners are not mentioned. We might assume that a reference to “the people” would include the foreigners. Even when Moses is delayed in coming down from Mt. Sinai, we are not told that it is the foreigners that urge the creation of the golden calf, only “the people.” Whoever it was, up until this obvious breach of trust with God, Moses is able to bear with them, and even defends them when God is ready to strike them down. Then, when Moses sees the golden calf, his anger gets the best of him, and he reacts against the people that he has previously tolerated. He recovers quickly, and we see him on the next day offering himself as a substitute for the people’s sin.

God chose well when he chose Moses for this difficult assignment. Moses was able to work with a large number of people and realize that they were all at different levels in their growth. He knew that they, himself included, were all in a very unusual learning situation. Moses was determined to help these stubborn people learn about the God of Israel, as he had had to learn. He had the strength to stand for God, and not go along with what the people wanted, when it was wrong, even though his firmness brought the people’s wrath upon him. Moses likely realized that, in the people’s shoes, he would have many of the same responses. God blessed Moses for his tolerance. Even though God sometimes wanted to act differently, God honored Moses’ requests for the people, which made the lives of the people more tolerable.

Tolerance In Our Lives –

Some practical evidences of tolerance we can see in our lives today are seen in the following “I Will” statements:

I will listen before I form an opinion.
I will look for ways to help others mature.
I will not confuse what is right with what is popular.
I will expect the same of myself as I expect of others.
I will accept my own unchangeables and the unchangeables of others.

Divide into pairs and discuss:

• Is there a particular group of people that you have difficulty tolerating?
• Why do you think it is hard for you to tolerate this group?
• How can you try to be more understanding of this group?

Tolerance In My Life This Week –

Spend a few moments in personal reflection:

• Ask God to show you one individual in your life in which He and you are displeased with your intolerance, and one measurable step you can take this week to overcome this intolerance.
• Share your action step with a trusted friend and ask the friend to hold you accountable to take that step this week.

​Biblical Example – Jesus and Mary
John 12:1-11, Matthew 26:13, Mark 14:3-9

Have you ever been in a situation where people were saying bad things about someone who did something they did not like, and maybe that someone was you? That is what happened to a lady named Mary. Jesus and a lot of other people were at the home of a man named Simon. All of the people were there to honor Jesus. Martha, who was Mary’s sister, was helping to serve.

Mary was a lady who had done some bad things in her life. We do not know what these things were, but it does not matter. When Mary met Jesus, she asked Jesus to forgive her sin, and she had been forgiven. At this party that was being given for Jesus, Mary took some very expensive oil, poured it onto Jesus’ feet, and wiped his feet with her hair.

Simon, the host, did not like Mary touching Jesus, because he thought she was a bad person. Jesus was not happy about Simon’s reaction. Jesus wanted Simon to be tolerant of Mary. Simon had not treated Jesus like a special guest was supposed to be treated. Mary was giving Jesus special treatment. Simon did not know that Mary’s sins had been forgiven. Jesus tried to help him understand the situation, even though he did not know all the facts. This is one way we try to be tolerant.

Some other people thought that Mary was being very wasteful. They wanted to have the perfume sold, and the money given to the poor. One of the people really did not want to help the poor, he wanted to steal the money. Jesus told these people that this woman was doing a special thing for him. She was preparing him for his death. The people probably did not understand what Jesus was trying to tell them.

Jesus wanted to help all the people who were in Simon’s home to learn to look at things from different perspectives. Even though some people may not act the way we think they should, we should be tolerant of them. We should try to listen to their point of view. Jesus was always tolerant of people, because he knew their weaknesses. We should always be tolerant of people, because there may be reasons for the way they act that we do not know about. When we are with our friends, we should not say mean things about others just because they do. Jesus does not want us to be tolerant of bad things, just things that are different that we may not understand. We should try to help people learn to be more understanding. We must remember that we do not always do the right things, so we should not expect other people to always do the right thing. When we are tolerant of others, others might be tolerant of us. This might help us to have very special friends that we might not have if we had not tried to understand where these people were coming from. We can not see into people’s hearts like Jesus did, but if we learn to accept people because it is what God wants, we will truly learn to be a friend to all.

Discussion Questions: Divide into small groups with a leader for each group.

• Are there children you do not like?
• Why don’t you like them? How are they different?
• What are some ways you could love them as Jesus would?

Personal Application:

• Identify someone who is different from you and your friends that you have not been tolerant of. Determine steps you can take this week to get to know that person. You will probably find that there is something very special about that person that helps you like them. And you will have a new friend.
• Plan to tell the class about it next week.

​Biblical Example – John The Baptist
Mark 6:17-29

The concept of tolerance in American culture has deteriorated. Rather than meaning to respect the right of another to hold a different view, it for many today means to accept almost any belief system or behavior of another as equally valid, even if morally wrong. For example, we are told to accept all “lifestyles,” including homosexuality, behavior the Bible clearly records as sin (I Corinthians 6:9-10) and describes a specific instance of judgment (Genesis 19). What attitude should a Christian have toward people involved in immorality? What response is appropriate and Christ-like?

John the Baptist is our example. John the Baptist was a prophet at the time of Jesus’ entry into His ministry, a prophet Jesus listed among the greatest. John the Baptist confronted the immorality of a king, Herod the Tetrach, committing adultery with his brother’s wife. “For John had been saying to Herod, ‘It is not lawful for you to have your brother’s wife.’ “ (verse 8)

As a result, Herod had John imprisoned. This action only enhanced the relationship between King Herod and John; for we read that, although Herod was perplexed and afraid of John, he kept John safe and gladly listened to all of John’s teachings. This shows the tolerance of John who must have been explaining God’s truth to Herod in a kind and loving way:

“…let our lives lovingly express truth in all things – speaking truly, dealing truly, living truly…”. Ephesians 4:15

Tolerance In Our Lives –

Keeping in mind that tolerance never includes compromising on the truths in God’s Word, here are five “I will” principles whose practice will help incorporate the character quality of tolerance into our lives:

1. I will not confuse what is right with what is popular.
2. I will expect the same of myself as I expect of others.
3. I will look for ways to help others mature.
4. I will accept my own unchangeables and the unchangeables of others.
5. I will listen before I form an opinion.

Questions for discussion:

• What are some areas in which Christians today need be watchful to not compromise their own biblical principles but, while respecting the right of others to their view, speak the truth in love?
• What are some of the reasons Christians don’t speak the truth in love?
• What are some of the reasons Christians are intolerant in not being willing to permit others to hold their own views? (Possible answers: fear, pride, lack of trust in God, ignorance.)

Tolerance In My Life This Week –

Spend a few minutes in personal reflection:

• Ask the Lord to show you matters and individuals to whom you are to speak the truth in love this week.
• Commit to speaking the truth in these situations, and ask the Lord to help you.
• Ask a trusted friend to pray for you and hold you accountable.

​Biblical Example – Paul’s Admonition
Romans 14:1-21

In this passage Paul admonishes the Roman Christians to not judge harshly those who are less mature and/or those who have different standards of conduct. For example, if a Christian believes he should be a vegetarian, do not belittle or attack his belief, and do not flaunt your own freedom to eat meat. Consider your brother’s need, and be tolerant. Paul sums up his advice in verse 19: Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification. Thus, focus on what is important: unity, the person’s needs and mutual growth.

While Paul specifically addresses tolerance in the spiritual dimension of life, tolerance is necessary and needs to be applied in all areas: the annoying habits of others; the value and customs of others from different ethnic, racial or cultural backgrounds; individual quirks and preferences; and other differences. It is important to note that biblical tolerance does not mean compromising on essential truth (such as the deity of Christ, the authority of Scripture, and other biblical truths.). It means compromising on the non-essentials of our faith (such as denominational preferences and customs, varying styles of worship, etc.)

Tolerance In Our Lives –

Some practical evidences of tolerance we can see in our lives today are seen in the following “I will” statements:

I will not confuse what is right with what is popular.
I will expect the same of myself as I expect of others.
I will look for ways to help others mature.
I will accept my own unchangeables and the unchangeables of others.
I will listen before I form an opinion.

Divide into pairs and discuss:

• What are some of the roots of intolerance? (Possible answers: fear, ignorance, perfectionism, pride)
• Name some common areas in which we often see intolerance in our own culture both Christian and non-Christian. (Possible answers: in racial issues, in ethnic and cultural issues, in life style issues.)
• What are some ways we can use to overcome intolerance, both personally and in our society? (Possible answers: exposure and interaction, education, communication, humility, openness, commitment to the Lord to love our neighbors.)

Tolerance In My Life This Week –

Spend a few minutes in personal reflection:

• Identify one area of intolerance in your life that is bothersome to you (and to God).
• Write a plan for beginning to work on this area of weakness.
• Share the plan with a trusted friend and ask him to hold you accountable.